Difficult Conversations and why they are a must
One of the common barriers to resolving business issues such as underperformance, poor attendance or unethical behaviour is the avoidance of having difficult conversations. It is human nature for us to avoid what makes us feel uncomfortable and without anyone holding us to account it is easy to do nothing when faced with an awkward conversation. This decision however can have a very negative impact to a business both financially and culturally. Examples of a difficult conversation may include; not appropriately letting someone know they will not be getting the pay increase; not discussing someone’s drop in productivity or not addressing behaviour which is negatively impacting others. If conversations are avoided, these circumstances can cause friction within your business and lead to an erosion of trust and harmony within your teams.
How do you know if a difficult conversation is indeed necessary? Our best advice when considering ‘should I or shouldn’t I’, is to ask yourself, is this going to hurt my business in some capacity if I do not have the conversation? This could be through a resignation, lack of productive output or decrease in overall office moral. The other question to consider is, how will my team be impacted by this situation if I do nothing? It is best to have the conversation as quickly as possible to resolve problems straight away before they have time to escalate and become a bigger issue. Avoiding conversations can disrupt your credibility as a leader and may impact your teams willingness to confide in you in the future.
Research shows that when conflicts are left unaddressed, emotions can flair and relationships can breakdown. Ineffective conversations can cause a manager to become frustrated when problems don’t resolve, and behaviour can turn reactive versus proactive. Comments such as “You aren’t meeting your KPI’s and if you want to work here you have to do better.” are no longer considered acceptable in today’s business climate. Employees are not tolerating unreasonable management practices that do not allow employees a fair process for improvement. It is more common for employees to accuse their managers of bullying when they feel they are experiencing ongoing criticism on their performance that is too harsh and does not consider the employees points of view. Ensuring your leaders are trained in how to have difficult conversations will ensure you meet necessary compliance standards whenever they are required to manage performance.
Most Managers would agree that it is the difficult conversations that keep them up at night more than anything. Nobody wants to be a bearer of bad news or enter into a potential conflict with a volatile staff member but avoiding these situations only builds anxiety and stress. When we hold onto emotions and are not honest about how someone’s actions are affecting our business, it can impact our health and wellness. Ongoing stress caused from avoiding conversations can lead to insomnia, migraines, high blood pressure and chronic mental health conditions. Getting appropriate support with these difficult conversations can ensure you have the confidence to say what is necessary in a way that is both professional and critical for the business outcomes. The below Linked in articles further discusses the impacts of not having a necessary conversation. https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/why-do-leaders-avoid-truth-patrick-o-reilly/
It isn’t easy to tell someone they are not performing but by not having the conversation they will most definitely never improve. When having a conversation around performance, a good starting point could be something like: "I noticed that you missed the last two deadlines, what’s happening? How can I better support you to ensure this improves?" Allowing the other person to contribute ideas collaboratively will help to minimise a defensive response and increase the chance of behavioural change. If you can remove your own personal considerations and judgements, stay open minded and listen to what your employee has to say you may uncover the underlying cause of their behaviour and together find solutions. Whatever the circumstance is, having a direct conversation helps to get to the source of issues, gain understanding of one another’s points of view and create a way forward. Facing difficult conversations can build trust between you and your staff and will often lead to great ideas and positive outcomes for the business.
A thorough process should always be followed whenever you are dealing with sensitive issues that may impact another person emotionally. There is a responsibility to ensure you are empathetic, allow the other party to express their points of view and ensure there is clarity in your conversation and in any follow up documentations. If you unsure of what this may entail, we recommend saving a copy of the Manager’s guide to difficult conversations in the workplace which can be found on the Fair Work website.
